What Writing Taught Me About Love (and Letting People Be)

​So… I’ve actually been maintaining weekly blog posts since May of this year—and I have to say, I’m really proud of myself for that. I haven’t always been this consistent, and for a bunch of reasons. But if I’m being real, it mainly came down to this: it just wasn’t a priority. No big fancy explanation. It just… wasn’t.

But now it is. And honestly? I can’t even tell you exactly why it is now.

Sure, the SEO boost is a nice little perk of showing up regularly, but that’s not really the thing driving me. Over the years, I’ve realized I have an audience that may not always engage publicly—no high amount of likes or comments—but they read. They reflect. They digest quietly what I share.

And guess what? I’m totally okay with that. More than okay, actually.

Because truthfully? There’s just too much damn content out here. Too many expectations. Too many creators begging for engagement, chasing validation, or guilting followers into responding so they feel seen. I don’t want that from you or for you.

I just want you to take what resonates—chew the meat, spit out the bones. Don’t feel pressured to show up in my comments or DMs just to prove you’re “supporting.” Ain’t nobody got time for that.

I wear a lot of professional hats—therapist, coach, entrepreneur, marketer, writer—but at the core, I’m simply a creative being. And when I’m not releasing that creative energy into the world—through writing especially—I feel drained. Self-expression is how I breathe. I have to get it out, or I’ll explode.

And that’s what this blog is for: me releasing, and you consuming—however you want, whenever you want, and in whatever way works for you.

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​From Content to Connection

While reflecting on this whole thing, I started thinking about relationships—and how often we “gatekeep” affection or connection from our partners.

We withhold love or certain “privileges” if our partner doesn’t meet specific expectations, follow our rules, or align with the stories we’ve been conditioned to believe about what love should look like.

But be honest—sometimes, we expect our intimate partners to be our everything. Just like some creators expect their followers to like, share, buy, comment, and constantly engage.

And while it feels good when they do, why does it have to be a requirement all the time? Eventually, people burn out. And in relationships, that same burnout happens when one partner is constantly trying to be everything for the other.

Now, don’t get me wrong. Standards matter. Consent and respect are non-negotiable. But when it comes to love languages—quality time, gifts, words of affirmation, acts of service, physical touch—ask yourself: is it really your partner’s job to meet those needs all the time?

Let's look at deeper reasons to be in a relationship that has less to do with our partners checking boxes and more to do with the connection itself.

Maybe it’s because of shared values.
Maybe it’s because you make a great team.
Maybe it’s because they understand your quirky sense of humor.
Or maybe it’s just because you genuinely appreciate who they are—and you want to share space with them.

The point is, give your partner the opportunity to show up for you in the ways they can and want to—and do the same in return. You won’t always meet every single need of theirs either, and that’s okay. If your love is authentic, it’ll show up without being forced.

So I’ll leave you with this question:
What do you think authentic love really looks like in relationships?
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I’d love to hear what you think (or not, haha). Either way, it’s all good!